The idea of working with the "inner child" might seem abstract, especially if you're new to the concept or struggle with connecting to your emotions, body, or imagination. The inner child represents the emotional and psychological remnants of our childhood experiences, often carrying wounds from unmet needs, traumas, or overwhelming emotions. Healing this part of ourselves is a crucial step toward emotional well-being and a more fulfilling life. A previous blog post that I wrote about the RAS goes into more detail about how these childhood memories become the roadmap to our reactions and the way we show up as adults.
For those who find it challenging to visualize or connect with their inner child, somatic therapies offer practical, body-centered approaches to facilitate this healing process. These methods can bridge the gap between the mind and body, helping you access and heal deep-seated emotional wounds. There are many different somatic therapies out there, and all of them are effective, some more than others. In the Brave Steps program, the selection of these therapies have been carefully selected, curated over time and experience, bringing the most powerful mechanisms of self-healing to the average human being in a structured and blended formula that can be tailored to meet individual healing needs. Through the Brave Steps program, we explore somatic therapies like TRE (Tension & Trauma Releasing Exercises), breathwork, HeartMath, and compassion therapy—grounded in the influential work of various trauma experts such as Peter Levine and Bessel van der Kolk. Singularly, these modalities are powerhouses in their own right, but as a hybrid, curated blend that is skillfully combined in the Brave Steps program, the effect is exponential, and profound.
Your inner child is a part of your subconscious, or “superconscious” that holds onto your earliest experiences, both positive and negative, as well as the innate healing wisdom that every cell in your body possesses. These memories are stored in the limbic brain, in part due to the role of an area of the top of the brain stem known as the RAS, or Reticular Activating system. This area of the brain has a very important role: to make you survive, despite all odds. When early experiences involve trauma, neglect, or unmet emotional needs, they can create lasting imprints that influence your thoughts, behaviors, and emotions as an adult: basically, the experience gets stored as a crucial memory in which the outcome was “you survived”, despite how traumatizing it may have been.
As a result of your survival, your mammalian brain wants to create a map of this survival, recording how you felt and what your response was, so that it can recognize similar threats as you move forward in life, and respond in the same way again, ensuring further survival. Healing the inner child involves reconnecting with this part of yourself, addressing unresolved pain, and nurturing the self-compassion that may have been lacking in your formative years or through these experiences. It is through this process that we are able to re-write our survival map and rewire the brain in order to shut down a stress or trauma response, therefore no longer allowing that mammalian brain to control your body instinctually in a state of constant survival mode.
Unfortunately, trauma often disrupts our ability to feel safe within ourselves, leading to disconnection from our emotions and bodily sensations. Circling back to somatic therapies, this is where they can be incredibly helpful—offering a way to engage with your inner experiences through physical practices, making the process of healing more accessible, recognizing that trauma is not only a psychological experience but also a physical one.
One of the powerful modalities used in the Brave Steps program is TRE, or Trauma Releasing Exercises, developed by Dr. David Berceli. TRE is a series of stretching and fatiguing exercises that help activate the body’s natural tremor mechanism to release deep muscular tension caused by stress or trauma. These tremors are the body’s way of "shaking off" tension, allowing it to return to a state of calm. The process provides a way to release trauma without the need for explicit memories or visualization. As you engage in these exercises, your body begins to let go of deep-seated tension, which can help you feel more grounded and connected to yourself. This physical release can be the first step toward reconnecting with your inner child, even if you find it difficult to access emotions or memories consciously.
Breathwork involves the conscious control of breathing for durations of time to enter an altered state, which influences your emotional, mental, and physical being. Brave Steps uses breathwork to help connect clients back to their body. When we live predominantly in a stress response, we eventually forget to breathe properly. By this I mean that many people end up relying on the work of their intercostal muscles (those tiny but effective muscles that work synergistically to expand and collapse your rib cage) instead of deeper diaphragmic breathing. This becomes habituated, and there is a cascade effect of oxidative stress that occurs in the body, leading to all sorts of dis-ease. By focusing on your breath with the rhythmic and timed guidance of a trained breathwork facilitator, you can access deeper layers of emotional experience, often bringing to the surface emotions that have been buried or disconnected from conscious awareness. The results are profoundly powerful and life changing, helping to gently break down the barriers between your conscious mind and the deeper layers of your psyche, where your inner child resides. Breathwork sessions often lead to a greater sense of clarity, emotional release, and a stronger connection to your inner self, as well as rewiring the brain to create new neural pathways and revitalization.
HeartMath is a scientifically validated approach also utilized in the Brave Steps program, that focuses on the heart's role in emotional regulation and resilience. By learning to regulate your heart rhythms through techniques like heart-focused breathing (slightly different than breathwork), you can cultivate a state of coherence—a balanced state where the heart, mind, and emotions are in sync. Through the HeartMath techniques, Brave Steps offers a tangible way to access feelings of safety and calm. As you practice these techniques, you create an internal environment where it becomes easier to explore and heal unresolved emotional wounds. HeartMath is particularly effective in helping you build resilience and self-compassion, which are essential for inner child work.
Compassion therapy, also known as compassion-focused therapy (CFT), was developed by Dr. Paul Gilbert and emphasizes the importance of developing self-compassion to address feelings of shame, self-criticism, and inadequacy. Together with a powerful, modified approach known as Compassion Key, the Brave Steps hybrid approach is particularly relevant for inner child healing, as it encourages you to treat yourself with the kindness and care that may have been missing in your early years. Compassion involves fostering a compassionate dialogue with your inner child. This might start with simple validations or visualizations, even if you find these challenging. Over time, as you practice self-compassion, you may find it easier to connect with your inner child and provide the nurturing and validation needed to resolve the trauma imprint.
The Brave Steps program foundation is based on the work of trauma experts such as Peter Levine and Bessel van der Kolk, who have greatly influenced the development of somatic therapies. Peter Levine’s Somatic Experiencing® approach emphasizes the importance of sensing the body and releasing trauma stored in the nervous system. Bessel van der Kolk, author of “The Body Keeps the Score”, highlights how trauma is stored in the body and the need for body-based therapies in trauma recovery.
These pioneers in trauma therapy have shown that healing is not just about talking through experiences but also about feeling safe within your body and releasing the physical imprints of trauma. Throughout my career, I discovered the single most important factor in successful recovery from trauma lies in connection. Connection, most importantly, to your inner child, connection to the felt sense, connection to that higher wisdom and knowing, and of course, connection to a community filled with loving support and compassion.
Healing your inner child is a deeply personal journey, and it's okay if the process feels challenging or unfamiliar at first. By working with these therapies, you can begin to heal the wounds of your past and move toward a future marked by greater self-compassion, emotional resilience, and inner peace.
~ Namaste
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